Poop Freeze!

We all know about Elmer and poop. Can't see it, can't smell it, can't touch it.

Thanks to SkyMall (you know, that really cool magazine available on airplanes where you can buy awesome stuff) I found the following that could be the answer to our prayers. (Ok, I haven't really prayed about this).


Love your pup but hate the poop? Yeah -- we do, too. So we'd jump at any product that could take the yuck out of our canine waste disposal duties. Poop Freeze purports to do just that by freezing the dookie into a solid lump that won't squish or smear. But in our backyard (I won't say "hands-on") trials, the squish persisted, even when we sprayed the, uh, poop out of the dung and waited the recommended 10 seconds for rigidification to ensue.

We don't know whether it worked any better in the Poop Freeze laboratories' clinical trials because, as you can (or can't) see in the picture above, the photographer discreetly left the target of the spray.

Yep, I thought this was the product we've been searching for - for Elmer's sake. But alas, I went onto the SkyMall website to read the reviews. After all 15 bucks is a good chunk of change!

Customer Review: 2 out of 5

Pros: poo did not stink (WELL, THAT'S A GOOD START!)

"Did not make "poo" hard. sticky, in fingernails." (AW, COME ON NOW! THAT'S JUST NASTY! DO YOU REALLY THINK SHE THOUGHT SHE WOULDN'T NEED TO USE FRICKIN' GLOVES??

Gender: Female
Age: 41-45

So, even if I thought it might work, I'd never be able to use it without gagging thanks to the review above and the description of the dookie into a solid lump that won't squish or smear.

Luckily the reviewer lives in Arizona. I don't have to wonder if every shopping cart I touch from now on, previously had her hands on it...