I was sound asleep on the couch last night (Elmer was snoring upstairs in the BED) when I woke up to sound of of the 3 dogs racing down the stairs. Right behind them came Elmer in his undershorts.
"What are you doing?"
"Daisy just barfed on the floor and I tried to clean it up but I keep throwing up"
"Oh for heavens sake, I'll go up and clean it up."
Before I can make it upstairs, he's in the downstairs bathroom throwing up again. I trudge upstairs, still half asleep with the roll of paper towels and carpet cleaner. I search and search, looking for the big pile of nasty stuff. Nothing.
"Where did she barf? I can't find it."
"Right at the foot of the bed."
I kid you not, one spot was the size of a silver dollar and another the size of a quarter. I clean it up and go back downstairs.
"I can't believe those two tiny spots made you throw up."
"Well, I'm sorry, you know I can't stand that stuff."
Oh Dear Lord...
Elmer swears he's done snoring, so I head upstairs with him to sleep in the bed. After about 30 minutes, I hear Daisy - sick again. Elmer makes a run for the bathroom.
"Sorry, I can't clean it up." So he steps over it and I tell him to go ahead and take the dogs downstairs and sleep down there. I'm too tired to do this again so I'll wait until morning.
Again, I go to clean up the mess. Again, it's the size of a quarter. So, I go downstairs.
"What the hell, you stepped OVER that tiny spot - you couldn't clean that up? It was the size of a quarter for God sakes!"
"Well I SORRY! You know I can't do that."
So I kissed Elmer goodbye before he left for work.
"I'm still kind of mad at you."
"Mad at ME? Why?"
"For making fun of me last night."
"Well, dear, I just can't help it. You're just weird."
Then this morning as I was telling mom this story, she reminded me how when Elmer and I were dating, she used to have to keep brown paper bags on hand at home because he would hyperventilate. At least he's outgrown that.
Ya gotta love him...
5 comments:
Of course I have to mention the time he barfed because he stepped, barefoot, in a pile of dog poo.
And yet Elmer thinks nothing of going in up to his elbows to pull out the warm, steaming stinky guts of an elk he's just shot...or skinning a deer and hanging it's carcass in his garage.
He's a complicated man, that Elmer.
And yes, we gotta love him. But only cuz he's family. ;D
Yep, I can't figure that out - how he can skin a deer, a beaver, anything he shoots or traps, but yet, he can't clean up poo or puke.
How conveeeeeeniant!
AND, there were things he boiled, and/or cleaned last year that had neighbors gagging as they walked near your house/yard. And HE stood there with a big grin on his face enjoying every minute !
He does keep us amused and definately give us priceless humor at times !
ps. your pictures really add to the tale. !
Yea, I LOVE the dog barfing in the toilet!
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