My mother, bless her heart. She feeds the birds and loves them. She has one problem however, and that's neighborhood cats that tend to "sneak" on her birds and have often killed them. She hates that.
A few years ago, she watched as a neighborhood cat caught and killed one of her tweety birds. She was having none of that. She ended up catching the cat, set it into her big plastic garbage can, shut the lid, found a BIG stick and spent the next few minutes banging the garbage can. KAPOW! KAPOW! KAPOW! Needless to say, neighborhood kitty was scared shitless and when mom finally opened the lid, said cat flew out of that garbage can never to return.
Well, this spring mom kept seeing a cat out laying under one of her bushes. She was sure the kitty was stalking her tweety birds. This cat however, was very friendly and would run up to her as soon as she opened her door. After watching kitty lay under her bushes for several days, she finally scooped kitty up and gave her "the trash can treatment." Yep, my sweet 80-year-old mother.
This time however, she noticed that kitty kept coming back. Only it was getting thinner and obviously wasn't eating - not even her birds. It was instead, eating her bird seed. Poor kitty, somebody had obviously moved and abandoned her. So, trash can kitty stole mom's heart and she started feeding her. As time has passed, mom felt so sorry for her that she now lives inside mom's house. On mom's wonderful bedspread, on her beautiful furniture - wherever she wants to sleep.
Trash can kitty now has a home, although she tends to sit and stare at mom sometimes - like she'd like to scratch her eyes out. I wonder if she's having flashbacks...
Oh my god. I love that story. I seriously laugh to the point of tears every. single. time.
ReplyDeleteAnd wait a minute...Mom hasn't told me that kitty lives IN her house now, sleeping on her bed and everything?? That's so sweet. I guess mom really does have a heart after all.
OH! I just had the most brilliant idea. When mom dies, let's give HER the trash can treatment!! OH HELL YEAH.
You are SO bad! I'm going to let you take care of that. I have a feeling, you're being taken out of the will as we speak! More for me! I LOVE you mom!
ReplyDeleteMom I want to know more about this Kitty in the house thing. Did you get her de-clawed? That would also help with the catching of birds.
ReplyDeleteJaci, mom calls her "kitty." She really does love her (I think!)
ReplyDeleteWhat have you done----telling everyone my story !
ReplyDeleteI TOLERATE Kitty. She's a big pain in the ass, ----she sharpens her claws on my furniture, ( I yell and shake my finger at her----that really terrifies her!) She tries to sleep by my head, which wakes me so I have to push her to the foot of the bed--she's back before I lie down. To clean the cat box I put on rubber gloves and try not to gag ---NEVER had to do that before. I leave the outdoor light on for her at night (boogie men scare her) and check the door often to let her in.
Anyone want a damn cat?
and Jaci, its not hiss, its pssssst. Then your family can tell people "my Mom psssst on the neighbor's cat."
Kate, you have an evil mind.
ReplyDeleteYou pssst me off !
Kitty is in deep trouble----she killed one of my birds this afternoon. I could have wrung her scrawny neck then and there. I'm still mad at her.
ReplyDeleteThat's one. much more bad conduct on her part, and its off to the POUND.!!!!!!! (i'm keeping track)