#5: Thought Provoking Question of the Day...
#4: I Have This Hair...
I hate moles. I have this little one on the left side of my upper lip that I hardly ever notice. I've decided that I'm now at the age where I evidently need to pay a little more attention to it. You see, it has this hair that grows out of it.
Normally, the hair is no longer than the other cute little invisible hairs that grow near my lips. For some reason, today I decided I should probably check it and damn! That little sucker was probably a quarter inch long - how long has it been like THAT? And why is it that only facial moles get those ugly hairs?
I remember once when I happened to scratch my neck and found this hair that was probably, AND I'M NOT EXAGERATING, 3 inches long. Dear Gob, how long had it been there and why hadn't SOMEBODY who loves me told me about it. How hard is it to say, "Hey, by the way, you have this big old long, ugly hair growin' outta your neck. You may want to pluck that ugly sucker."
Be assured, if I ever notice a big, ugly hair hangin' off some part of your body where it doesn't belong, I'll tell you.
probably.
maybe.
#3: Shhhh. It's Our Little Secret...
My sisters are coming to town in a few weeks. We have a little secret...
We're each going to get our noses pierced. Not big, ugly, gaudy, things. Just dainty, pretty little things - like this...
Mom doesn't want us to. She thinks we'll be scarred for life. She thinks we're gonna look like this...
But evidently, SOMEBODY has a
So now mom looks like this...
#2: Time For Another Elmer Fudd Story...
Yes, this actually happened...
Now don't get me wrong, I love my husband. But I have to admit, I sometimes feel a bit bad. Kate and Jacki read this blog called "Confessions of a Pioneer Woman." She's a city gal who married a cowboy and refers to him as "The Marlboro Man." Now how cute is that?
I however, have Elmer Fudd and like I said, I do feel kinda' bad calling him that but what else can I do when I have stories like this to tell.
Elmer Fudd loves being outside. It's his therapy. All the neighbors tell him he needs to get another hobby, that he shouldn't be working out in the yard all the time. (I think they're jealous of our yard). Elmer Fudd also loves his animals. I can't tell you how many times I've been reading or watching some fascinating show on tv and he comes to the door full of excitement and says "Honey, come see what the chickens are doing!" WTF??? They're chickens!!!! Ususally, it's something really exciting like they're eating the corn he just put out for them.
"Don't make me come and look at the chickens again unless they're doing the hokey pokey."
Last week, I was in the kitchen when Elmer Fudd came into the house from the backyard. I turned around to see him carrying Napoleon, one of the chickens. Before I know it, he's sitting in his recliner with that damn chicken on his lap! What the hell!!! It's a chicken for God's sake!
"Get that chicken out of the house!"
"Why? She likes being held."
"I don't care, it's a chicken and you can hold her outside if you want to hold her!" I'm beginning to feel hysterical... He pays no attention.
He's sittin' there in his chair rocking this chicken when the cat decides she wants to see what's up so she too jumps into Elmer Fudds lap.
Naturally, all hell breaks loose as the chicken realizes there's a predator within inches of her fuzzy black butt. The chicken flies off of Elmer Fudd's lap and he catches her in mid-air. We have a cat for hell sake, did he think this wasn't going to happen??
"Ok, get that damn chicken back outside!"
"Ok, ok!"
Black feathers EVERYWHERE! I can't believe I didn't take pictures before I vacuumed them up...
#1: In Honor of the First Day of Fall...
Happy New Year to you all. LIFE IS GOOD!
Fun!! I love re-reading those. Elmer bringing the chicken in the house for a cuddle definitely takes the cake. Really, what would we do without him?? Elmer, please don't ever become "normal."
ReplyDeleteDo you guys still have your noses pierced? I had forgotten all about that and can't tell from the pictures.I think a lot of people get them pierced and then let them go.Out of you 3 it will be interesting to see how many still have them.
ReplyDeleteWell, mine ripped out once and when it was healed and I was allowed to put in a smaller one, I did that but it wouldn't stay in so I finally just left it out. I think Linda and Kate both took theirs out. I loved mine and might actually get it done again!
ReplyDeleteThat nose ring looked really good on you. Especially with your cool blue glasses. :)
ReplyDeletepssst - I read The Pioneer Woman, too. She's a bit of an overachiever, but her photography is great. But I personally think Elmer is much better entertainment than The Marlboro Man.
ReplyDeleteI totally would have been the one bringing the chicken inside and my husband the one freaking out in that story. He's given up trying to convince me of the right way of doing things.
ReplyDeleteI totally would have been the one bringing the chicken inside and my husband the one freaking out in that story. He's given up trying to convince me of the right way of doing things.
ReplyDeleteYea jaci, that Morlboro Man may look pretty but he's probably one of these "normal" guys. Elmer, on the other hand, definately keeps us entertained!
ReplyDeleteI re-enjoyed your look back over the year blogs. And your new format is pretty green, but I don't like your toad ! He's icky.
ReplyDelete