Call Me Old Fashioned...

but to me, texting and dating are not a good mix.  It's been a while since I dated - a long while, but I'm trying to imagine what it would have been like to have someone text me for a date instead of the good old fashioned phone call.

I love to see people flirt.  It's adorable!  When someone texts you and asks if you want to go out, what fun could that possibly be?  You can't hear any emotion in their voice, and isn't that part of what really turns us into a drooling mess when we discover that we may like someone?  I've had the good fortune in the last few weeks to watch someone I care a lot about, flirt with someone.  It was adorable.  I haven't seen him act that way since he was a teenager.  To watch his eyes as he looked at her and to hear his boy-like voice as he teased her about things just melted my heart.

But with texting you get none of that.  I've watched several younger girls who are in the beginning stages of dating someone and they're always texting.  How can you tell what the guy is thinking if you can't hear it in his voice.

If I were dating in this day and age, I would be emphatic.  Unless it's an emergency, NO TEXTING!  If you can't pick up the phone and actually talk to me, then don't bother.  Are we at a point where we decide if someone is a good fit for us by reading what he types?  I guess we can quickly discover if he has grammar problems, but how can we really get to know someone without hearing their voice?  It just isn't possible.  I don't think it should even be considered interaction. 

Consider it in the simplest way:

Text: Wanna' go out?
Text back: k
Text: Bardonays Sat at 7?
text back: k  :)

REALLY?  With a phone call, you can at least hear in their voice some kind of flirtation or how serious they are about the date.  You can even tell if someone is smiling when you talk to them on the phone.  Plus, it's generally more than a few words and leads to an actual conversation.  Face to face is even better, you can see in someone's eyes if they really like you.  But texting, it's safe I suppose.  No emotions involved., only a few typewritten words.  It's really very sad.

To you younger girls still dating I would offer this advice.  No texting while dating.  Tell him to call.

Would you have liked "texting" instead of a phone call when you were dating?  Do you like texting with a friend instead of a phone call from them?  Maybe it's just me.

Ree and I Made Meatloaf!

I had hamburger thawed in the refrigerator today and decided I'd make meatloaf.  It was either that or Shepherd's Pie and we had that last night at Heather's house.  Elmer doesn't like my meatloaf so much.  It's pretty plain.  So, now that Ree and I are such a good team (ok, not so much) I decided to see what she had for a recipe.

It was called My Favorite Meatloaf.  I read the recipe and had all the ingredients I needed and none of them were expired so I thought I'd give it a try.  I have to admit, I was a bit sceptical when I saw that Ree's favorite meatloaf is covered in bacon.  Never heard of that, but I happened to have some bacon.

Ree's...

Mine...

Ree's finished product...

Mine...

She should however, have put in a little note somewhere of how I'm supposed to ever get this pan clean without getting my hands wet.  That sauce and bacon is cooked on there good.

Believe it or not, Elmer said it was the best meatloaf he ever ate.  Get outta here! 

The only thing I'd change is not adding so much bread.  I think I'd only add 3 slices instead of the 6, but I have to admit, it was good!  Want the recipe?

Elmer had also brought home some fresh green beans that someone at work had given him.  I would have just put them in a bowl and steamed them until they were mushy done, but what the heck, I'd thought I'd see what Ree had for green beans too.  These were to DIE for! 

Sorry Ree, but I wasn't about to cook bacon for the grease and not chop the bacon and cook it with the beans.  I also didn't have any red pepper so I left those out.  But they were the best green beans I've ever had.  I'll definitely be making these again.  Here's the recipe.

Ree's...

Mine...

I've been told by Sheri and Kate  a few people that I won't mention, that my photos are "shoddy."  I do need a new camera and I would imagine that you two critics could probably find me a pretty nice, new camera on Amazon.   I think today I would have made Ree proud (except for the photos).

I hope I don't start getting good at cooking or Elmer might expect me to do it every day.  I hate to cook...

PARAPROSDOKIANS

PARAPROSDOKIANS
(thanks mom, for sharing these!)


Here is the definition: "Figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation."

"Where there's a will, I want to be in it," is a type of paraprosdokian.

Ok, so now enjoy!

1. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

3. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

5. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

6. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

8. Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

9. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

10. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

11. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

12. Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'

13. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

14. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

15. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

16. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.

17. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

18. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

19. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

20. There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

21. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

22. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

23. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

24. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

25. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

26. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

27. A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you look forward to the trip.

28. Hospitality is making your guests feel at home even when you wish they were.

29. I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.

30. When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.


My personal favorites:  #1, #11, #13, #17, #23 and #27

Yours?

Ada Country Criminals...

See this?

No, No!

We had a card on the gate about a week ago from an Ada County Code Enforcement Officer.  To make a long story short, Ival has been working with them for the last week trying to get this to go away.  But, according to Ada County, "you colored outside the lines."

Cost?  $350 fine.  Then we have to hire an Engineer to come and and tell us how badly we destroyed our property and how to fix it, then we have to hire someone to do the work.

I know Engineers aren't cheap.  I have a feeling this will cost us several thousand dollars.  And we're nice people damnit!  We even did this

after the fire to ensure the hillsides wouldn't slide away and that the wildlife would have food on our place.

Sigh.

Between this and not selling our house, I was tempted to cry today - but I didn't.  Instead, I spent the day thinking about the fact that our son will be home soon, while 30 families received their sons draped in flags this week.  I've missed him so much.

Things could definitely be worse.

The Pioneer Woman Teaches Me to Cook... or, Let's Go Out to Dinner!

I discovered that the Pioneer Woman and I have something in common.  We both love soup.  I had found a delicious-sounding recipe the other day for cauliflower soup and thought I'd give it a try.

I went to get the recipe out of my cob-web ridden recipe drawer and couldn't find it so I thought I'd look online for one.  The first one that popped up was by the Pioneer Woman.  From here on out, I'll call her Ree, 'cause we really are kindred spirits.  See, I even have a pretty cast iron pot just like hers...

Here's here recipe.  Looks good huh!

So I started digging out my ingredients and when it got to the chicken broth I had to make my own.  Yep, got out the bullion to add to the boiling water.  Luckily, it was a new jar so I popped off the protective cover and dug my teaspoon in to get the proper amount.  When it says "granulated" doesn't that mean it should be like sugar, or sand?

Why does mine look like black tar heroin?  I accidentally dropped some on the floor while I was taking a picture.  Looks like Elmer's chew...

I went ahead and dug out 4 teaspoons and added it to the water.  Man, that is NOT lookin' good.  I figured before I added it to the soup I'd taste it 'cause it just didn't look right. 

I noticed this code on the lid.  Do you suppose that means "Void after 12/69?  I wonder if this jar belonged to grama...

Guess what, it didn't taste right either.  Luckily I found some bullion cubes from the 70s that I'm pretty sure were still good.

Ree suggested you add some sour cream.  Not mandatory, but good.  Good thing it wasn't mandatory.  Expired 5/11.  Guess that's how long it's been since I've had the kids over for tacos...

I wonder if Ree ever has contests for people who aren't really up to par on their cooking skills.  I know she invites people to her place every now and then from contests.  I'm thinking I could benefit from a lesson or two.  If you see such a contest, let me know will you?

Get home soon honey!  Mama cooked dinner!

Psssssst!  If I'm not online in the morning, send the paramedics, would you?

Redneck Paintball Duck Hunting/2012 Hillbilly Games...

Kate emailed this to me, thinking we should add this to next year's Hillbilly Games. 

I need to decide if we'll be putting up tents and doing the games on the farm this year, or should I reserve the barn again?  Whether we do it at the barn or the farm, we'll have plenty of room at the farm for everyone to pitch their tents or park their campers for the night.

Which would you prefer - tents for shade and an improvised dance floor on the farm, or the comfort of the Hidden Springs barn?  I'm thinking we'll do it the end of April or sometime in May.

Our beneficiary next year will be Wish Granters of Idaho, a new organzation that really needs a good kick start. 

Yeehaw!

Yep, Time for Another Elmer Post...

I had just walked Jacki out to her car as she was leaving.  As I turned around to go back in the house, I saw Elmer running from the back of the house, swatting his head with his hat and doing quite the "dance."  He'd been in the backyard getting the chicken eggs.

I didn't have to ask, but I did.  "What happened!?"

"God damnit!  I just got stung about 5 times on the ear!  Dirty bastard, that hurts!"

"Oh crap I wish you could have seen yourself!.  That's the funnies damn thing I've seen in a long time!" "Well get in the house and let's look at it."  So we hurried inside and I found a sting on his ear - damn, that had to hurt.  I got out a frozen bag of corn and he wandered around with it for a few minutes.

"I'm running over the hill to get some wasp spray so I can kill those bastards."

When he got home, he sprayed the nest and then started on the outside light fixtures.  I saw some wasps still crawling inside one and asked him if he'd sprayed that one.  He saw the wasp inside the fixture and said he didn't think there was a nest in it.  He then proceeded to walk over and tap on the glass.  What he didn't notice was that there were 4 wasps on the outside of the glass and one nailed him so fast it made my head spin.

"Well you dumb ass, what did you do that for!?"  "Oh shit honey!  You just got it again!"

And he did his wasp sting dance again with the filth pouring out of his mouth, and I tried sooooo hard not to laugh. 

I've laughed about it felt so bad about it all day.  Oh how he entertains me!

Temporary Housing For the Farm?

Is that cool or what!

Anyone Missing a Child?

Friday was really busy down at the Merc.  I had one of my regular guys in who was waiting for his wife before he ordered lunch.  He waited and waited and finally she showed up - with an extra kid.  She had found this 3-year-old wandering outside the neighborhood on Dry Creek Rd.  Wearing only a t-shirt.  No shoes, no diaper, nothing.  She though he might have a slight learning disability as he couldn't talk well but told her that his name was Lucas.  He looked to be of Eastern Indian decent.

Naturally, we all started calling people in the neighborhood asking if they knew any little boys by that name and no one that we contacted knew where he might live.  Mandy had called Ada County when she found him and they came and met her at the Merc.  Finally, the Deputies found out who the parents were and called them.  Mom answered the phone and said she'd be right there.  About 20 minutes later she showed up.  Didn't seem to show any concern, said Lucas had been missing for about an hour and a half.

WTF?

Evidently, they're new up here - and they live on my street.  They're going to need to understand that we don't roll like that up here.  I'm going to make sure that I watch for Lucas and I'd better not see that 3-year-old out wandering the streets.  Luckily, we know where he belongs now.

We got so busy that I didn't get to talk to Mandy to find out what the cops did or said.  Can you believe it????

Joining the Military...

Adam decided several years ago that he wanted to join the military after he graduated from high school.  Kids and their ideas change so I didn't think too much about it until the last 6 months when he decided it was time to talk to the recruiters.  Don't get me wrong, his brother is currently in Iraq with the 116th and I couldn't be prouder.  I love that my boys want to serve their country.

Adam had his heart set on becoming a Marine.  His grampa was a Marine.  His second choice is the Army because he wants to be Infantry.  Now that, I must admit, scares the hell out of me.  I'm not ready to know that he's on the front lines of a war.  But then again, what mother ever is.  However, if it's what he really wants then it's something I'll support him in.

However, we discovered that things have changed.  They've changed more than I could ever have imagined.   With so many men losing their jobs, evidently the military has "upped" their standards.  It's not easy to join, in fact, in downright difficult.  The Marines won't even consider you if you have taken any online classes for high school.  Yep.  If you haven't taken all of your classes from a regular high school, you're screwed.  Adam was so disappointed.  He never would have done online high school if he had known, but then again, it wasn't like this when he started online school.

And the Army, well they did say that if he actually graduates from Boise High, they'll take him if he scores high enough on the ASVAB.  What a shame that our military is taking people who probably don't really want to join, but have to because of the economy, and ruling out those who really want to serve their countries.

Adam spent two entire days just crushed, saying that he doesn't know what he'll do with his life if he can't join.  He's not ready for college yet but will be someday.  I thought the military would have been a wonderful start for his transition into adulthood.  I had no idea that it would turn out like this.  I guess we'll wait and see what happens next spring...